Alan P Carr - Sales Bully in Borneo

Do You Deserve More Sales? If So...

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NEW - Your Website, with My Writing and Selling Advice will get More Sales from the Same Visitors - Guaranteed!


That’s a bold headline, isn’t it?

A copywriter who GUARANTEES he will bring you more sales?


In the entire history of sales-writing such a guarantee has been almost unheard of, even considered impossible to offer.

So what’s different here, and now?

Why am I so confident?

Because it all starts with you…

Yep, YOU.

You see, there’s no great secret – it’s because I’m very fussy who I’ll help – I’ll ONLY work with you when I’m totally sure I can, and WILL, give you a positive return on your investment.

So scroll down and let’s see if you’re a suitable candidate…

Does This Describe You..?


If you don’t fit this criteria I might still be able to help you, but if you CAN give me a positive ‘Yes’ to the points above then we’re a great fit – and I WILL improve your sales!

You see, it’s because of – and all about – synergy…

You, Me, Synergy

Part of the criteria is not just can I help you, but do I want to?

That’s because I only have time to assist small to medium-size business owners, people who both DESERVE my assistance and who WILL benefit from it.

This is why I work directly with, and stand shoulder to shoulder beside YOU, the business owner, the decision-maker and the beating heart of your business. 

I also insist that whatever you’re offering your customers must be of decent quality, at a fair price, and that you must genuinely care about those people. Do that, and you’ll have my loyalty.

You’ll have me at your side and on your side,  holding back nothing in helping you!

Here’s the thing – we team up as partners, but there’s a BIG difference…

…because I’m offering you a simple, fixed-priced package.

Unlike some copywriters and agencies I don’t demand a percentage of your increased profits, I don’t expect any company equity – and my fees don’t go up and down like a yo-yo based on how much your project is worth!

I value a fair and simple life, and so do you, right?

Of course that means it’s important that we get along together, so here’s what I DO demand from you:

Here’s what happens when you give me the above (click each photo to see their quotes below the pics):


Here’s the Catch…

About now you may well be wondering “What’s the catch?”

Guaranteed extra sales?

Who the heck is this guy?

Well as explained, I’m able to offer my outrageous guarantee because I’m fussy who I’ll work with – but yes, there IS a catch or two…

Firstly, the guarantee covers a Quarterly Consultation (when you hire me for 3 months, rather than per assignment). No copywriter – even Alan P Carr  – can offer guarantees for short-term, single-shot projects. 

Secondly, I only work with 2 such Quarterly Clients at a time,  which means there’s a maximum of 8 ‘slots’ available, per year.

Yep, you gotta be quick – OR lucky enough that I’ve reached out to offer you a slot. That’s rare, but it does happen (especially in the boring ‘monsoon’ rainy season!)


And here’s something even more crazy than my guarantee…

…and it’s GREAT news for you!

I left the UK to be a full-time copywriter more than 10 years ago, on the tropical island of Borneo.. Can you guess what that means?

Yep, my standard of living is comfortably high, but my COST of living is crazy low…

And that means I can make my fees surprisingly lower than you might expect!

How much lower?

Well let’s compare…

A 2017 study by the UK’s Professional Copywriting Network reveals the average British copywriter, if paid on a daily basis, is paid over £300 per day.

That means a 3 month contract with an experienced UK copywriter like me costs in excess of £25,000.

Big corporations can afford it – and a long-term boost in sales could easily be worth more than £50,000 for them, even £100,000 – but what about smaller businesses, like yours?

Can your business afford a real copywriter?

OK, for fun and giggles, let’s go in the opposite direction; how much would it cost you to hire a fast-food worker in the UK, at just £7.20 per hour, the UK’s minimum wage?

If full-time at 40 hours per week, over 3 months that would be exactly £3,456, and that’s before the extra costs and payroll taxes of employing someone.

So when I say low, I mean it – because my fee for a 3 month professional partnership with you is just $3,450, total.

Yep, I’m entirely serious.

Imagine the potential impact on your business? 3 full months of an experienced UK copywriter, an expert at boosting sales from websites just like yours, for the same as you’d spend hiring a burger-flipper?

But wait, because my fee is in US dollars not UK pounds Sterling, so you’re actually getting me for LESS than minimum wage!

Of course I don’t work by the hour nor flip any burgers; our 3 months together means we have time for research, road-mapping, some split-testing, and more.

In short, working out how to make YOU maximum money.

I do insist you tell me about your website, traffic, income, projections – and your dreams – to ensure my service will be a positive investment for you.  You’ll see I do NOT hide or change my fee based on what I believe you can afford or what the project is worth. I keep it open, simple, and fixed, so you should be open with me too.

Click the orange “See more” button below the Quarterly Consultation package, to discover just what I’ll be doing for you and your business – IF you snatch one of this year’s 8 slots:


(Subject to Availability)

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